{"id":751,"date":"2021-08-25T14:05:33","date_gmt":"2021-08-25T12:05:33","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/stylelife.cz\/?p=751"},"modified":"2021-09-26T21:48:44","modified_gmt":"2021-09-26T19:48:44","slug":"falesny-respekt-k-diteti-podrazi-rodicum-nohy","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/?p=751","title":{"rendered":"„Fale\u0161n\u00fd respekt k d\u00edt\u011bti podr\u00e1\u017e\u00ed rodi\u010d\u016fm nohy,“"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

„\u00dakolem rodi\u010d\u016f je st\u00e1t se takov\u00fdm \u010dlov\u011bkem, kter\u00e9mu d\u00edt\u011b tou\u017e\u00ed naslouchat,“ je p\u0159esv\u011bd\u010dena \u010ce\u0161ka Katka Kr\u00e1lov\u00e1, autorka v\u00fdchovn\u00e9ho konceptu nevychov\u00e1, kter\u00fdm ji\u017e \u00fasp\u011b\u0161n\u011b pro\u0161ly desetitis\u00edce rodi\u010d\u016f. P\u0159e\u010dt\u011bte si obs\u00e1hl\u00fd a podn\u011btn\u00fd rozhovor, ve kter\u00e9m se dozv\u00edte, co v\u0161echno je d\u016fle\u017eit\u00e9 pro dobrou v\u00fdchovu d\u00edt\u011bte.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Katka Kr\u00e1lov\u00e1 zalo\u017eila v\u00fdchovn\u00fd projekt nevychov\u00e1. Foto: archiv Katky Kr\u00e1lov\u00e9<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Pro\u010d se v\u00e1\u0161 program vol\u00e1 nevychov\u00e1, kdy\u017e v n\u011bm jde hlavn\u011b o v\u00fdchovu?
Je to jednoduch\u00e9, v\u00fdrazn\u00e9, i zlehka provokativn\u00ed, tak\u017ee ten n\u00e1zev u\u017e nezapomenete (\u00fasm\u011bv). Hlavn\u011b ale jde o to, \u017ee je to v\u00fdsti\u017en\u00e9. V nevychov\u00e1 jde o v\u00fdchovu, nenab\u00e1d\u00e1me rodi\u010de, aby d\u011bti nechali vyr\u016fstat jako d\u0159\u00edv\u00ed v lese. Ale je to zcela odli\u0161n\u00fd p\u0159\u00edstup ne\u017e klasick\u00e1 v\u00fdchova, kde spolu rodi\u010de a d\u011bti v\u011bt\u0161inou bojuj\u00ed. Jde o to za\u010d\u00edt se respektovat, naslouchat si a porozum\u011bt pot\u0159eb\u00e1m toho druh\u00e9ho. N\u00e1zev se n\u00e1m l\u00edbil hned na za\u010d\u00e1tku a tak\u00e9 zp\u011btn\u011b si mysl\u00edm, \u017ee p\u0159i hlub\u0161\u00edm pohledu dob\u0159e vystihuje to, co d\u011bl\u00e1me.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nejsou \u0161patn\u00e9 d\u011bti ani neschopn\u00ed rodi\u010de, probl\u00e9m je v komunikaci. To je jeden z hlavn\u00edch princip\u016f nevychov\u00e1. Jak\u00fdch komunika\u010dn\u00edch chyb se rodi\u010de nej\u010dast\u011bji dopou\u0161t\u011bj\u00ed ve v\u00fdchov\u011b sv\u00fdch d\u011bt\u00ed?
Jednou z nej\u010dast\u011bj\u0161\u00edch v\u011bc\u00ed nap\u0159\u00edklad je, \u017ee rodi\u010de nev\u011bd\u00ed zach\u00e1zet s d\u011btsk\u00fdmi emocemi. \u0158e\u0161\u00ed jejich bu\u010f zleh\u010dov\u00e1n\u00ed ve smyslu: „Nepla\u010d, to nic nen\u00ed, to bude dobr\u00e9“ nebo pop\u00edr\u00e1n\u00edm: „Dost u\u017e, p\u0159esta\u0148 se roz\u010dilovat“, p\u0159\u00edpadn\u011b ignorov\u00e1n\u00edm – to je to klasick\u00e9: „nev\u0161\u00edmaj\u00ed si ho a po\u010dk\u00e1m, a\u017e ho to p\u0159ejde. „Nic z toho v\u0161ak d\u00edt\u011b nenau\u010d\u00ed s emocemi zach\u00e1zet a v\u0161echno to jen nahr\u00e1v\u00e1 st\u00e1le \u010dast\u011bj\u0161\u00edm emo\u010dn\u00edm sc\u00e9n\u00e1m.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mo\u017en\u00e1 to rodi\u010de poznaj\u00ed, \u017ee se jim doma opakuj\u00ed sc\u00e9nky pln\u00e9 pl\u00e1\u010de nebo hn\u011bvu neust\u00e1le dokola a se st\u00e1le zvy\u0161uj\u00edc\u00ed se intenzitou. To je v\u017edy dobr\u00fd sign\u00e1l, \u017ee to chce v komunikaci n\u011bco zm\u011bnit. Kdy\u017e to \u0159eknu velmi jednodu\u0161e, je t\u0159eba se v t\u011bch emo\u010dn\u00edch situac\u00edch nau\u010dit zastavit a pod\u00edvat se na n\u011b i z pohledu d\u00edt\u011bte. A \u0159\u00edk\u00e1m z\u00e1m\u011brn\u011b „iz pohledu d\u00edt\u011bte“. A\u010dkoliv je d\u00edt\u011b v t\u00e9 situaci d\u016fle\u017eit\u00e9, nen\u00ed v n\u00ed jedin\u00e9.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Abych v\u00e1m to „z pohledu d\u00edt\u011bte“ ale v\u00edce p\u0159ibl\u00ed\u017eila, vemte si t\u0159eba takov\u00fd jednoduch\u00fd p\u0159\u00edklad: D\u00edt\u011b si omylem rozdrt\u00ed svou obl\u00edbenou hra\u010dku a pl\u00e1\u010de. Z na\u0161eho pohledu se mo\u017en\u00e1 nic hrozn\u00e9ho nestalo, m\u00e1 p\u0159ece dost dal\u0161\u00edch hra\u010dek. Tak\u017ee mu za\u010dneme \u0159\u00edkat bu\u010f: Nepla\u010d, to nevad\u00ed, viz, m\u00e1\u0161 je\u0161t\u011b medv\u00eddka a pandu a aut\u00ed\u010dko \u2026 nebo naopak „v\u00fdchovn\u011b“ zahl\u00e1sil: \u0158\u00edk\u00e1m ti to po\u0159\u00e1d, \u017ee si m\u00e1\u0161 na ty v\u011bci d\u00e1vat pozor, tak nyn\u00ed nerev. No, a te\u010f si p\u0159edstavte, \u017ee si rozbijete svou obl\u00edbenou \u0161\u00e1lek, je v\u00e1m to l\u00edto a n\u011bkdo v\u00e1m \u0159ekne: „Nepla\u010d, viz, kolik m\u00e1\u0161 je\u0161t\u011b v poli\u010dce jin\u00fdch \u0161\u00e1lk\u016f. A v\u00ed\u0161 co, m\u011bla sis na ni d\u00e1vat lep\u0161\u00ed pozor. „Celkem nep\u0159\u00edjemn\u00e9, \u017ee? Necht\u011bli byste mnohem rad\u011bji sly\u0161et n\u011bco jako: „Je ti to l\u00edto? M\u011bla si ji r\u00e1da, nicm\u00e9n\u011b. „<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A t\u00edm chci \u0159\u00edct, \u017ee d\u011bti od n\u00e1s pot\u0159ebuj\u00ed tot\u00e9\u017e vc\u00edt\u011bn\u00ed se, jak\u00e9 bychom si p\u0159\u00e1li od druh\u00fdch my sami, kdy\u017e m\u00e1me t\u011b\u017ekou chvilku. A jist\u011b\u017ee je \u0161\u00e1lek banalita, ale takov\u00fdch situac\u00ed, ve kter\u00fdch n\u00e1m vc\u00edt\u011bn\u00ed chyb\u00ed, s n\u00e1mi d\u011bti za\u017e\u00edvaj\u00ed stovky. Nejen, kdy\u017e jde o emoce.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jin\u00fd p\u0159\u00edklad je, kdy\u017e d\u00edt\u011b d\u011bl\u00e1 n\u011bco z na\u0161eho pohledu ne\u017e\u00e1douc\u00ed. Rodi\u010de \u010dasto reaguj\u00ed stylem: Ne. Ned\u011blej to. To nem\u016f\u017ee\u0161. Nechytej to. Jednodu\u0161e ho zastav\u00ed. M\u00e1lokdy se ale ptaj\u00ed na d\u016fvody: pro\u010d to vlastn\u011b to d\u00edt\u011b d\u011bl\u00e1, co ho na tom zaj\u00edm\u00e1 nebo o co mu jde? Chce lze ukl\u00edzet v\u011bci jako maminka, kdy\u017e se \u0161plh\u00e1 na my\u010dku a st\u00e1le stla\u010duje ty zak\u00e1zan\u00e9 knofl\u00edky? Nebo si chce v\u011bci prohl\u00e9dnout, kdy\u017e st\u00e1le sah\u00e1 na to, na co nem\u00e1?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Samoz\u0159ejm\u011b, vy mu nemus\u00edte dovolit, aby d\u011blalo v\u0161echno, co si usmysl\u00ed. Ale je rozd\u00edl, kdy\u017e na n\u011bj vyhrkla: „Nechytej to!“ A lze jej i capnete po ruce, nebo kdy\u017e mu s pochopen\u00edm \u0159eknete: „Chce\u0161 si prohl\u00e9dnout m\u016fj mobil? Ten ti ale nechci d\u00e1t do ruky, v\u00ed\u0161. Promi\u0148, boj\u00edm se o n\u011bj. „<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\"\"<\/figure><\/div>\n\n\n\n

Nejen\u017ee to je citliv\u011bj\u0161\u00ed, ale p\u0159edev\u0161\u00edm od v\u00e1s d\u00edt\u011b tento zp\u016fsob komunikace odkuk\u00e1va. Tak\u017ee se pak nemus\u00edte do\u010dkat toho, \u017ee n\u011bkomu d\u00e1 na h\u0159i\u0161ti lopatkou, kdy\u017e mu nebude cht\u00edt p\u016fj\u010dit hra\u010dku, ale m\u00edsto toho t\u0159eba \u0159ekne: „ne\u0107emo p\u016fj\u010dit, plep\u00e1\u010d.“ To je mimochodem re\u00e1ln\u00e1 historka, m\u00e1me takov\u00fdch p\u0159\u00edb\u011bh\u016f od rodi\u010d\u016f v nevychov\u00e1 hromady, a v\u017edy m\u00e1m velkou radost, kdy\u017e rodi\u010de zm\u011bnou komunikace najednou zjist\u00ed, \u017ee jejich d\u00edt\u011b je fajn citliv\u00fd \u010dlov\u011bk, a ne divok\u00fd, nezvl\u00e1dnuteln\u00fd prev\u00edt.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Jak m\u016f\u017eeme tyto \u0161patn\u00e9 komunika\u010dn\u00ed n\u00e1vyky odstranit? Na co m\u00e1me kl\u00e1st d\u016fraz, abychom s d\u011btmi dob\u0159e vych\u00e1zeli?
T\u011bch v\u011bc\u00ed je v\u00edce a ned\u00e1 se to zjednodu\u0161it na p\u00e1r rychl\u00fdch tip\u016f „Co ud\u011blat, aby to s d\u011btmi klapalo“, pokud nem\u00e1 b\u00fdt odpov\u011b\u010f povrchn\u00ed. Zpravidla je t\u0159eba zm\u011bnit komunikaci od z\u00e1klad\u016f, kdy\u017e c\u00edt\u00edte, \u017ee s d\u011btmi nevych\u00e1z\u00edte, \u017ee v\u00e1s nap\u0159\u00edklad zlob\u00ed , neposlouchaj\u00ed, ignoruj\u00ed nebo ty star\u0161\u00ed se p\u0159ed v\u00e1mi zav\u00edraj\u00ed v pokoji a p\u0159evracej\u00ed o\u010di, kdy\u017e jim n\u011bco \u0159eknete.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

„\u00dakolem rodi\u010d\u016f je st\u00e1t se takov\u00fdm \u010dlov\u011bkem, kter\u00e9mu d\u00edt\u011b tou\u017e\u00ed naslouchat,“ je p\u0159esv\u011bd\u010dena \u010ce\u0161ka Katka Kr\u00e1lov\u00e1, autorka v\u00fdchovn\u00e9ho konceptu nevychov\u00e1, kter\u00fdm ji\u017e \u00fasp\u011b\u0161n\u011b pro\u0161ly desetitis\u00edce rodi\u010d\u016f. P\u0159e\u010dt\u011bte si obs\u00e1hl\u00fd a podn\u011btn\u00fd rozhovor, ve kter\u00e9m se dozv\u00edte, co v\u0161echno je d\u016fle\u017eit\u00e9 pro dobrou v\u00fdchovu d\u00edt\u011bte. FacebookKatka Kr\u00e1lov\u00e1 zalo\u017eila v\u00fdchovn\u00fd projekt nevychov\u00e1. Foto: archiv Katky Kr\u00e1lov\u00e9 Pro\u010d […]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":752,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"tdm_status":"","tdm_grid_status":"","footnotes":""},"categories":[766],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-751","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","has-post-thumbnail","category-pro-zeny"],"amp_enabled":true,"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/751","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcomments&post=751"}],"version-history":[{"count":1,"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/751\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":832,"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/posts\/751\/revisions\/832"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=\/wp\/v2\/media\/752"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fmedia&parent=751"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Fcategories&post=751"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/www.stylelife.cz\/index.php?rest_route=%2Fwp%2Fv2%2Ftags&post=751"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}